Boss piles work on new employee, continually setting unrealistic expectations: 'Everything is a priority right now'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 18, 2026 10:00 AM EDT

When everything is a priority, nothing is a priority.

Good management is all about setting your employees up for success. You can have the best, most talented workers in the world, and if they're not given the right resources, they will flounder. They won't know what to prioritize, and they won't have the bandwidth to get it done. Good managers know their way around this and will match the right resources to the right projects. Good employees can be efficient, but nobody can do everything by themselves. We all need support, and we all need help to accomplish the things we'd like to accomplish. Nobody can do it alone. But we're not always going to be handed what we need on a silver platter. We won't always have someone anticipating our needs, so we need to advocate for ourselves. 

The manager in this story didn't quite understand that and left their employees to flounder. And when they tried to stand up for themselves, it wasn't working. So what do you do when you do everything you think you're supposed to, but it still comes up empty? We're told that we need to advocate for ourselves, but nobody tells us what we're supposed to do when we're struggling beyond that. Where do you turn when your boss won't listen to your reasonable complaints? What are you supposed to do when nobody wants to listen to you?

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  • A stressed out employee sits at a table full of papers
    via Adam Evans-Pringle

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • That's what came up in this story, where an employee was growing increasingly frustrated with how they were being treated by their higher-ups. In their eyes, they weren't being set up for success and were tired of scrambling to get work done. The way their boss saw it, they wanted to squeeze every last drop out of them. But if you try to squeeze someone for all that they've got, soon enough, there will be nothing left to squeeze. Keep scrolling for a full picture of what was happening here, and see if you agree with what commenters had to say. Everyone has a story like this; it's just a matter of how you spin it.

  • How do I professionally tell my new boss that her deadlines are unrealistic?

    I transferred to a new department about two months ago and have been in this role for over five years. My boss has been in their role for one year. The department was excited to bring me on for my expertise, and because of that they loaded me with tasks from day one. In a 1-1, I told them I want to do my best work but don't feel set up to do so given the workload and timelines. The response was
    via u/Awkward_Condition778
  • simply, "You came on at a busy time." When I ask for clarity on priorities, I get "Everything is a priority right now." When I flag that a deadline needs to shift due to higher priority tasks, the response is "Hopefully you can still meet the original deadline." How do I keep communicating that their expectations are unrealistic without it falling on deaf ears?
    via u/Awkward_Condition778

  • Commenters gave their takes on the situation.

    Extreme-Evidenc... "you came at a busy time" aka everyone else just quit because i am unsufferable
    via u/Extreme-Evidence
  • HardLithobrake When everything is a priority, nothing is. Do what you can to fight the biggest fire and f all the rest. Not your job to fix management issues.
    via u/HardLithobrake
  • Hecker8778 dude this is the priority trap. everything becomes urgent nothing becomes important. tell her straight that trying to execute on 10 things kills 1 thing well. frame it as quality or speed, not both. friction here is her management infrastructure not your execution.
    via u/Hecker8778
  • ThoughtConstant... I had a boss like this early on in my career. They wanted everything done and everything was a priority. For a while I tried to get everything done and it affected my health and wellbeing, I was on the brink of burnout. I got this idea
    via u/ThoughtConstant8405
  • from the movie 300 where the Greeks stand their ground against the Persians by narrowing the battlefield such that the higher numbers become a liability instead of an asset. I used the "Top 3" and "Must Have / Nice to Have" silos. Your boss can have a gazillion requests but you can only work on the top 3,
    via u/ThoughtConstant8405
  • in order of priority. So when she gives you everything at once, politely tell her you'll get to it at the expense of task 3. Bringing focus back to the top 3 narrows the channel, it may cause some friction in the short term, but will make everyone more efficient long term. Don't be afraid of that friction. You can use a negotiation
    via u/ThoughtConstant8405
  • simulator like chatvisor to help you manage those conversations, and in the meantime keep pushing back on constant task- switching, context-switching carries its own inefficiency cost. Generally when people treat everything as a priority, it comes down to one of three
    via u/ThoughtConstant8405
  • things: 1. Poor organization, 2. Undiagnosed ASD or ADHD, or 3. No project management experience. Number 3 is the most common and the most fixable, project management tools and some basic training can go a long way. Wishing you the best of luck as you navigate through this.
    via u/ThoughtConstant8405
  • A stressed out employee looks at a laptop
    via Vitaly Gariev

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Roshi_IsHere I just ask what I'm doing first. Then work my eight hours doing whatever is the most important. If everything is high priority and none are higher than others than everything is low priority and I'll do whatever I want first
    via u/Roshi_IsHere
  • luthiel-the-elf I would make a Gantt chart about the tasks that need to be done and show manager why things take time. If you can get other people to tell you how long some things. take in your industry then it'll help.
    via u/luthiel-the-elf
  • Marquedien You need to hack together a visual blocking system for your calendar. It will probably have to start with outlook or Gmail meetings. Make reasonable estimates of how long each project will take and block them out. When a new request drops
    via u/Marquedien
  • without a schedule, share your calendar and request direction on which project to push back hours/days/weeks (actually changing all the project schedules in a standard calendar will waste 15-20 minutes each time, so you should look for dynamic scheduling software).
    via u/Marquedien
  • Vast_Bad_39 u don t need to argue just force decisions. I can hit two of these today which two matter most? puts it back on her.
    via u/Vast_Bad_39
  • wewerecreaturres If everything is a priority, nothing is a priority. That's what I tell my stakeholders anyways.
    via u/wewerecreaturres
  • Ambitious_Clock_... I divided my whiteboard in my cube into 3 sections: "today, end of week, end of month" and whenever he added a new item, HE had to determine if it overrode the existing list. I'm happy to drop everything to focus on what he wants, but he is responsible for prioritizing and knowing it can't all be done today.
    via u/Ambitious_Clock_8212
  • loveridden13 I had a boss like this. It only got worse. I had to go above her head to her boss (who had previously been my direct supervisor). Eventually I found a new job.
    via u/loveridden13
  • Icy-Stock-5838 Try the varied advice given around here.. Else PICK ONE, critically determine which ONE is important, focus on it, GET ER DONE.. Then move to the next one.. If boss complains she didn't get her cake and eat it too.. Tell her she didn't provide clarity to enable to you deliver anything complete..
    via u/Icy-Stock-5838
  • Her answers entail her wanting 3x of one-thirds completed, than 1 complete with 2 partials.. Incidentally, she's implying you can live at work to get it all done and make her look good. Ultimately, if you do too much of this, you open her up to labour lawsuits (esp if you track all your excess hours).
    via u/Icy-Stock-5838
  • Illustrious-Noise-... A spread sheet or equivalent is the best option. You need at minimum a column that show the name of you task, the date it was given to you and the date it was completed. They will question what you've done and they key is for you to remember what you've done and create visibility around that.
    via u/Illustrious-Noise-96
  • drhip You pick the ones you think. should be priority and start from there. If you miss some deadlines that hopefully would trigger something in her mind
    via u/drhip
  • Best Praline_2619 Pause a little longer than feels natural, and in a calm inquisitive tone. " But how am I supposed to do that?". They press, indicated it's hard for me to give you a confident Yes without knowing how.
    via u/Best_Praline_2619

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boss antiwork job bosses work coworkers working toxic-boss workplace
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